Halloween 2

Starring Lois Lane, Dr Johnny Fever and Weird Al

It figures I couldn't go 2 movies in a row on here and have them both be great. Where do I begin with Rob Zombies latest vision? And that's just the problem here, Zombies visuals are all over the place and none of them original. Its almost as if he swept up the cutting room floor on the sets of The Ring and The Grudge for some of his terrible imagery and when it came time to create his own tense moments he opted instead to simply add stab counts to the countless and pointless murder scenes. I swear Michael Myers would have carpal tunnel problems after all that hacking.
Now onto the ridiculous actors involved. The girl playing Mikeys sister couldn't carry Jamie Lee Curtis' lunch let alone a scene of her own. The incessant screaming wore thin about 15 minutes into the film and it only got worse. She has a multitude of breakdowns and nightmares and then shakes them off in the end in order to go party with her friends when most people would have checked themselves into an asylum after seeing what she has seen.
Mixed in with the terrible acting is the terrible dialogue. Just laughable at times. With gems like "slow your roll" you can tell you're watching an instant classic unfold. The dialogue only gets worse when you consider the equally hilarious delivery from these low level actors. I'm all for Rob Zombies wife being in every movie he makes, but when she remains fully clothed and plays a ghostly vision of the Myers matriarch while hanging out with one of the Budweiser Clydesdale's that was photo shopped (poorly)to appear all white, then I take issue with her relevance. She has a baby like voice and the lines that she had to spew were simply ineffective.
OK now onto the lame violence. If Mike stabbed someone in the first remake 10 times,well then he better stab someone 11 times in this one. It was almost like a fun game to try and guess how many times these goofs were going to get their heads bashed or chests stabbed. Either way, no one wins.
And for my final rant here, Malcolm McDowell's Dr Loomis was for some reason turned into a glamour hog of an asshole this time around and was in all actuality completely unnecessary and honestly served zero purpose. Damn, I forgot one little thing that bugged me in terms of the background nonsense and set designs. OK this is the last rant I promise. For some reason this movie was to have taken place in present day and yet several people in the story were seen watching black and white televisions and there is even an old dial style radio. Is this supposed to be a throwback to 1981 to make it a bit nostalgic? If so, it failed. It just looked out of place and sloppy.
I think I'm done with this one for now and if you haven't guessed, here's the rating...

Rating 1 1/2 Moody Blues videos out of 5